I have a distinct memory from years ago where a girl who "slept around" entered the church I went to at that time. I remember thinking "what is that whore doing in a church?". I was 17, knew a all the "Church 101" things, and loved Jesus, even though I don't think I was mature or focused enough to really understand much more than these surface things. It was hypocracy at it's finest because I had even had sex at that point But it wasn't "as bad" as what she was doing because at least I wasn't sleeping around. At least I didn't dress that way. At least I didn't do drugs or drink. I felt fit to pass judgement, although the 1 sermon I've given was on not judging.
Why would I give a sermon like that? I had a guilty conscience. I had a secret that I kept, except to my very closest of friends…and I even wound up going back and saying I had changed my mind. I remember the realization of this secret a few years before, at another church, and breaking down and becoming a blubbering moron because I thought I was going to hell. And I had begged and pleaded with the Lord to change this, anything but this. I was so astoundingly devestated. Because unless you're a murderer or rapist, nothing is worse to a church than being one of the LGBT. For me, specfically, bisexual. But I tucked it away, denied it, therefore continuing to be a good Christian.
Something eventually changed after spending hours a day in silence. (short Army stint) But I made the choice to no longer live dishonestly. So, when I came home, I came out. Which elicted every reaction from "ok, whatever" to "you're going to hell". I have heard the term "Jesus loves the sinner and hates the sin" so many times by now that after typing it a few seconds ago, I will never say it again. I continued to go to the church, but it eventually just wasn't a good fit anymore. I couldn't go to another church though, knowing that if I were "out" in the church, I would meet heavy opposition and judgement. Knowing that all they would want to do was change me and my "sinner" lifestyle.
I wasn't wrong, if you were wondering, about how various places would react. I told one pastor I didn't feel welcome in his church and that he repelled those in need rather than attracting them. From what I have heard, things have changed a bit there. Another church I walked out of when the pastor went on a serious rant about the liberals and homosexuals. I told the kid who invited me that I would never step foot in that place again. He never spoke to me again, by the way.
So the one who was fit to judge someone for being a sinner and coming to church was now the one being judged for being a sinner and afraid to go to church. How fitting.
Take a look at this, here. http://epistle.us/articles/immoralwoman.html It is the story of Luke 7:36-50, where Jesus deals with people like this. A Pharisee (pretty much the religious elite) who is judgemental towards Jesus for allowing a "sinful woman" to come near him. Jesus turns the tables back on the Pharisee who feels himself fit to judge.
God works in interesting ways. I do now have a wonderful church. While I know the pastor and I are not in agreement about LGBT being sinful, he has never made me feel condemned. (it was never about having someone "agree" with me) I have made it a goal never to shame someone, and never to exclude extending an invite to someone because of their lifestyle. No one should feel too ashamed, embarrassed, or judged to enter into a church. Or community that is to be centered around the same God who, in the above story, showed love and compassion without hesitation to the "lowest of the low" without making her feel that way.
